With the holiday season looming and winter just ahead, all of us will be busier than ever, and that means a greater possibility of accidents. But, unfortunately, these are stressful times with more and more citizens resentful of others whom they believe do not fully meet their expectations and deserve their approval. I feel obliged, therefore, to remind those particular readers of the correct protocol if by chance during the coming days and months they are trapped in a burning house, wedged in a twisted vehicle, or surrounded by rising El Niño flood waters. These are the questions I suggest they present immediately to any first responder:
The first: “What is your country of birth?”
Next: “What is your religion?”
Finally: “What is your political affiliation?”
This is America, a free nation, a country guaranteeing liberty for all. Consequently disgruntled Americans have a right to refuse rescue by any liberator whose answers to the above questions do not fully match their world view.
So to those of you bound by strong beliefs and prejudices, simply keep these questions in mind; you may need them. And, if you have to, remember you can always tell your rescuer, “No thank you, this is a free country. I’ll just wait for someone of my own kind to come along!”