Posted on April 16 at 11:54 a.m.

I'm sorry, but what are those parents of hers thinking? They raised a beloved daughter and then they don't fully accept who she is and still love and accept her after knowing that she's gay? She can't speak her partner's name? Are the parents thinking that if they ignore it, she'll decide to change her sexual orientation?

Our daughter (one of our five terrific children) came out about eleven years ago, while still in high school, and we felt it wasn't any different than any other choice she's made in her life. It's her life to live and her right to choose it's course. She is a fabulous, wonderful, funny, and kind-hearted human being, gay or not. We love her, and her long-time partner, and would have missed so much had they not been welcome in our lives, in our home, and in our hearts. Our entire family cherishes and loves them both, including Grandpa and Grandma (in their mid-80's), and her partner's entire family loves and cherishes our daughter equally.

We are life long Christians and attend a big, local church, but we feel that her life should not be judged by others, especially not us. She has decided she's atheist, but we know that our God is a loving God and believe that he loves her and always will, just as we do. We focus on love and acceptance, those are the principles Jesus based his teachings on.

We hope that Penny's parents will take a look at their behaviors and see just how inappropriate THEIR behavior is and take steps toward loving their daughter just as she is, without judging nor condemnation, and accept her as she is. This would also obviously extend to her partner, who should also be loved and warmly received.

Sometimes we wait too long and too much of a wall is built, or something happens (like death) that keeps us from being able to rectify a problem, so I'm hoping Penny's parents will see this and start the process now. Perhaps counseling might be the right first step for her parents, and we encourage them to start to process of accepting Penny's life choice and her partner. Look for the beauty and the good in them. Stop judging, just love them!

B&V in SB

On The Indy’s Gay Girl Hits SBCC

Posted on April 7 at 9:03 a.m.

Wonderful story about a great resource that Cottage Hospital has brought to Santa Barbara: Dr. Tamir Keshen! Our 14 yr. old son required neck surgery last summer and we were incredibly impressed with Dr. Keshen's background and surgical talent, as well as his wonderful ability to explain the process and be empathetic toward both our son and us. We received complete information and great follow-up care after the surgery from Dr. Keshen and his office staff and the Cottage surgical center staff couldn't have been more kind and supportive to us in our worried state. There are many really great physicians and surgeons in Santa Barbara who match Dr. Keshen's level of customer service, and then there are some who could do much to improve their attitude toward patients and provide complete information, expert care, ...and empathy! Dr. Keshen and his staff could definitely set the standard to which all could aim for. Kudos to Cottage Hospital for bringing him to benefit the Santa Barbara community!

Barbara and Victor Bartolomé
Santa Barbara Scrapbooks

On Baby Saved by Super Surgery in Santa Barbara