George Orwell’s 1984 is one of the greatest novels of the last century. In it, the protagonist’s job is to eliminate all words that are unacceptable to Big Brother. This week, the Trump Administration published a list of words that federal employees are no longer allowed to use. The examples given in this piece are all included in Trump’s list.
TO: ALL WORKING MEMBERS OF THE NEW TRUMP ADMINISTRATION
SUBJECT: TRUMPSPEAK
To meet our president’s new ideological requirements, we have created Trumpspeak. This new, controlled language simplifies grammar and limits vocabulary so that government workers can teach the American people how to have great thoughts again.
As you know, President Trump has made remedial English our national language. This will allow us to correct the “Wokespeak” propaganda that prior administrations fed to our confused citizens. By simplifying the language and limiting one’s vocabulary, you will now be able to perfectly understand what our great leader is talking about.
The evil forces of the left have made our beautiful language a decadent tool for them to use to corrupt our citizen’s minds. It has confused our people into forgetting that critical thinking is no replacement for good old “gut feelings.”
To free ourselves from this “Wokespeak” cascade of lies, we will no longer let government agencies use their perverted language to incorrectly try and contradict the great ideas and thoughts that President Trump is expressing.
To do this, we have purged impure words and thoughts from all government documents. We will now make every effort to convert all government documents into Trumpspeak. By doing this simple task, we can finally rid America of the horrible thoughtcrimes foisted upon us by the media and even our schools.
So join us in helping Making Our Language Great Again. Here are some examples of what we intend to do:
• You will never read again such terms as assigned male or female at birth. You will never have to see the word Trans. We all know there are only two immutable sexes, and one of them can no longer be referred to in government documents as feminists.
• Nobody will be referred to as Black, culturally appropriate, or discriminated against. The words diversity and diversifying are now forbidden in government documents. Such terms as equality, ethnicity, segregation, and prejudice are no longer needed.
• Federal environmental pronouncements no longer need to mention terms like climate change, climate crisis, or even climate science. From the Gulf of America to the North Pole, government memos will continue to help us stop the critical energy emergency we now face.
NOTE: Any use of these words will automatically flag for review any grant proposals and contracts that could conflict with Mr. Trump’s executive orders.
