On September 27 at the Carousel House, Friendship Center (FC) celebrated 50 years of providing day care programming for adults living with dementia. Members, family and friends of current and past members, staff, volunteers, and supporters gathered to reconnect, reminisce, and celebrate this treasured nonprofit. With members of the FC community thinking of themselves as a big family, the free event indeed had the feeling of a family reunion.
The 200 guests enjoyed a picnic lunch, music by the band Peer Pressure and DJ Darla Bea, a high-energy cheerleader performance by San Marcos Cheer, trishaw rides from Cycling Without Age, memory jar making, displays of hundreds of photos, and most importantly, quality time to reconnect with others in the Friendship Center family.
It was part of an anniversary weekend that included a full day Dementia Care Conference with national and local experts at the Leta Hotel. Intended to be an annual event, the conference attracted more than 100 guests. A post-conference survey showed a big improvement among attendees in their confidence in supporting someone with dementia. When asked what was the most valuable part, several responded, “knowing that I am not alone.” That, according to Executive Director Kathryn Westland, is “about as successful as we could ask for.”
Located in Montecito, Friendship Center offers daytime programming Monday through Friday to about 100 regularly attending members, with about 50 at the center each day. There are dedicated sessions for those with mild/early-stage dementia and for Spanish speakers. Last year, a Carpinteria Hub was established at the Lynda Fairly Carpinteria Arts Center, with programming two days per week.
Especially popular activities include pet therapy, art therapy, live music, dancing, fitness classes, puzzles, beach walks, and Cycling Without Age’s trishaw rides. Many other activities are offered, typically a dozen or so each day. Volunteer Gerrie Shapiro, who is a dog trainer, visits daily with one of her clients’ dogs, letting the dog greet dog-loving members while they are engaged in other activities, bringing lots of smiles along the way.
FC staff, Westland shared, have a remarkable history of staying connected to FC. Westland has been there for a total of nine years, previously serving as program manager; her ED predecessor served for 38 years, and a colleague, Esther Kratz, is on her 34th year. “One of the coolest parts of Sunday’s reunion,” Westland shared, was “seeing longtime former boardmembers, staff, volunteers, and families come back. People may leave a position, but that connection to the work and the people here really, really sticks with you.”
Enrollment has been growing quickly in recent years, in part because of a post-COVID rebound but also because of “us shouting a little louder about something that has been here doing incredible work for 50 years,” Westland related. Recognition has been pouring in, including being named the Nonprofit of the Year by the S.B. South Coast Chamber of Commerce.
Support Group members Suzanne Retzinger and Chris Emmons enjoyed connecting at the reunion. Both their husbands had been FC members until their recent passings. “I don’t think I would have survived without Friendship Center,” Retzinger confided. The support group was wonderful for her, and she enjoys staying on now, both for her own benefit and to help others. Her husband, a longtime UCSB professor, was very people-oriented, Retzinger shared, and would sometimes mutter that he wanted to go to Friendship Center more often, even though he attended daily (Monday through Friday).
Emmons has had two experiences with FC — first with her father back in 2003 and then recently with her husband, Bob Emmons, a venerated community leader. Bob really looked forward to going, Emmons related, in part because of the attentiveness of the staff, “there was kindness everywhere,” and as a music lover, Bob enjoyed the daily music program, which included pianists, opera singers, and karaoke. He was especially touched by being crowned Prom King at FC’s annual prom. Emmons is grateful for FC giving her consistent days where she could get a mental break and get things done. A support group offered myriad benefits too, including how to find help, and, as she noted, “at some point, everybody needs extra help.”
As a day program, FC does not qualify for Medicaid or Medicare coverage, but it operates on a sliding-scale fee basis, with more than 80 percent of members paying less than full price and some paying nothing. The majority of funding comes from community support; fees from members account for only 30 percent of revenue; investment income makes up only 6 percent. FC is committed to its policy of not turning anyone away because of an inability to pay. In addition to donations, volunteers for meal support, fitness activity programming, and its guest speaker program are always welcome.
Westland’s warmth and passion for the FC family is extraordinary. Friendship Center is a place, Westland shared, where “someone going through one of the most difficult chapters of their life can still experience friendship, laughter, purpose, sweetness, and joy, and where their family can know that they are loved and known while they are here.”
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