Man Won’t Change Style?

Ask a Stylist Counsels Dismayed Wife

Dear Ask a Stylist,

My husband has been wearing his hair in the same style since our wedding in 1967. The styles have changed and so has his hair, but he won’t change his style. Any advice?

- Wondering Wife

To channel the spirit of 1967, I looked up the Billboard Top 20 Albums of 1967. There was a lot of hair going on then! I suspect your husband also had a lot of hair then, and doesn’t have as much now. It sounds like your husband is a bit of a “Daydream Believer.” Men can be quite sensitive about their hair. Women, from a young age, experiment and change their look. Many men have not had such practice, and are therefore more resistant to change.

Crescent LoMonaco

Maybe it’s time to “Tell It Like It Is.” Have you tried telling your husband honestly that his style may not be the best choice for him? Have you told him his style looks like “Somethin’ Stupid?” If you have already had this conversation with him to no avail, maybe it’s time for the professional to step in. A stylist can often explain what looks are realistically available to your man according to his hair type, amount of hair, and level of maintenance.

Men aren’t typically as good with words as women, so a picture here is truly worth a thousand words. The stylist can show your husband several pictures, asking him to pick three or four of his favorites. She can have a conversation with him to ask what he likes and dislikes about each photo. Then, she will be able to see what those photos all have in common, and decide if what he likes about each photo is realistic for him. From there, they can create, together, a custom style using the ideas from the pictures.

After the style has been cut, it is important for the stylist to teach him how to style his hair, according to his level of maintenance, which they will have discussed during the consultation. It could be the greatest style in the world, but if he’s not willing to take the time to style it properly, or use the correct styling products necessary to maintain the look, it won’t look good on him. He’s better off with a cut that is realistically going to fit into his daily routine. Remember, change comes slowly for some, and it may take some time for him to learn to style his new ‘do. After all, he’s had the same look for 42 years! Give him some time to get used to it. Many stylists will offer a free 10-15 minute styling lesson after giving a new cut.

Hopefully the result channels more David Cook than Davey Jones. In the end, you’ll both be “Happy Together”!

Crescent LoMonaco is the owner of Salon Monaco in Carpinteria. She's been a stylist for 10 years and is happy to take your questions, which you can send to

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