Lately, it seems like every guy I’ve been even remotely attracted to is either still in love with his ex, happily married, or so preoccupied with his own appearance that it reminds me of Mike the “Situation” Jersey boy. (Yes, I admit to watching bad television at the gym!)
Needless to say, I’m excited about getting out of Santa Barbara for a while, and eagerly preparing for four-plus weeks in Europe. My trip will be a nice mix of business and pleasure, and I look forward to reconnecting with family and friends overseas. I’m especially thrilled to be catching (and hooking?) up with Euro-guy, whose increasingly flirty text messages send chills down my spine in just the right way.
His last text said:
“Hey PD. Great that you’ll actually be in this neck of the woods soon. Do you still have beautiful blue eyes and killer legsJ? LOL. Can’t wait to see you. Ciao, EG.”
Now, I wouldn’t exactly classify him as a “sure thing,” nor am I certain that I want anything to happen. However, I think there’s a fairly good chance of getting an invite to check out his stamp collection, if you know what I mean. After all, there was some fooling around during our last tête-à-tête, which ended abruptly when I had to flee his IKEA -style apartment to catch a plane.
My departure was actually a blessing in disguise, as one of my girlfriends later pointed out. Seeing as there was no way in hell I could have kept my clothes on much longer, the impending takeoff was really the only thing that made me keep my cools, and the plane ride home worked as the ideal substitute for a long cold shower!
I realize putting out on the first date probably isn’t the way to go if you’re looking for a serious relationship, regardless of what country you’re in. According to Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger, you’re supposed to pull the monogamy card and explain that you’re “not the type of girl who sleeps around.” In fact, to engage in any wine-dine-sixty-nine activities, Patti suggests you ask for assurance that you are now in a “committed, monogamous relationship.” Apparently, this is how you venture down the road of emerald-cut engagement rings and Hawaiian dream weddings.
While I’m the type of person who prefers to take things one step at a time, and nuptials are nowhere in sight, I’d still like to be considered marriage material as opposed to just the cute chick with the nice rack. In my last serious relationship we actually waited a few dates before locking lips, and two long months before getting freaky on the sheets. The anticipation didn’t ruin the experience. On the contrary!
All that said, I just feel that asking for a commitment from someone who lives approximately 3,000 miles away is a bit of a stretch. To sum up the extenuating circumstances:
• I absolutely expect that he has been dating other girls in my absence. I know I have been on a few dates.
• We had been friends for years prior to getting flirty, so I feel really comfortable with this guy and there’s a good level of trust.
• If not now, when? I definitely won’t be in Europe again for the next several months.
• Did I mention that he’s hot, with a runner’s body and seriously chiseled abs??
If you didn’t guess already, I haven’t engaged in anything beyond casual dinner-dates since I last saw EG. It’s not that I want to put all my money on this one horse, but I think it’s fair to at least give it a shot, in the spirit of reader Draxor, and the saying that “love has no boundaries and knows no distance.” If things don’t work out, I’ll then have a week to recuperate on the Italian Riviera, where, as you know, long-legged blondes are traditionally a big hit.
When do you think it’s okay to get naked with a new partner?
Happy dating and make sure to check in next month for a Euro-update!
(Questions and ideas gladly entertained. Feel free to chime in below, in the comments section, or contact firstname.lastname@example.org.)