Continuing a tradition performed previously for other publications and Web sites, Isla Vista’s longtime crime-spotter Rebecca Carroll now brings her blotter reporting to This is the first collection of incidents, often humorous, sometimes sad, but always slices of I.V.’s unique underbelly.

“Sleeping”; The Other Word for Passed Out

“Oh [darn], he woke up,” a burglar exclaimed before fleeing the Trigo apartment with iPod speakers, Xbox controllers, a 30-pack of Busch Light beer, and other items in tow.

Upon hearing the commotion, a housemate rushed from his bedroom at 4 a.m., June 19, to the living room, but not before the suspects ran out the unlocked front door.

Another housemate, who’d been “sleeping” on the couch during the burglary, did not hear a peep, he said.

I’ve Fallen and I Can’t Get Up

A man was arrested for public intoxication, June 26, after a concerned citizen found him facedown in the roadway. By the time authorities arrived on the scene, just before midnight, the subject, 46, was awake, but unruly.

Covered in dirt and leaves, the drunk told deputies he “ran over a stump.” Unable to negotiate his way home, let alone sit without help, he was hauled to jail instead.

The Up-in-Smoke Alibi

Her alibi did not have what it takes to keep her from being a suspect in the burglary of an Abrego Road fraternity last month. After finding her inside his bedroom, the fraternity brother detained the female until authorities arrived on the scene.

During an interview, the suspect, 21, told deputies she was playing beer pong with her friends at the fraternity at 2 a.m. when she decided to go, unaccompanied, into a bedroom. She said she was there to leave them some “weed,” but a search of her property uncovered a stolen iPod and Xbox games.

Scarred for Life

Responding to a report of a prowler at 3:25 a.m., June 19, deputies patrolling Trigo Road on foot nearly ran into the man matching the description received minutes earlier.

The caller told authorities he was startled awake when he discovered an intruder inside his bedroom.

Apprehended, the prowler told deputies he merely poked his head inside the residence “to meet girls.” And, possibly, he added, “see them naked.”

The suspect, 21, from Santa Barbara was arrested for prowling. And the victim, also 21, indicated he wanted to press charges.

The Blind Leading the Blind

Straying from his duties as the residential assistant of the Abrego Road apartment complex, June 20, the 19-year-old found himself the reason why authorities came a-callin’. Just after 1:30 a.m., deputies received a request from an apartment dweller who said the drunk RA, who earlier broke a window to her apartment, was now continually knocking on her door. When the pestering would not cease, the renter made the call for help.

On the scene, deputies found the disoriented RA still pounding on the victim’s front door and mumbling incoherently.

When contacted, he slurred, “I just want to go home and pass out.”

Despite the renter’s confidence the RA would take responsibility for his annoying antics when sober, deputies were not equally convinced. Unable to care for the safety of the residents’ — let alone himself — the RA was arrested for public intoxication.

Approach, Assist, Attack

A sorority sister awoke to a loud commotion, June 11, when a man armed with a fire extinguisher clumsily barged into her Embarcadero Del Norte bedroom. With a T-shirt tied around his head, the known UCSB volleyball player then opened fire on the sorority sister and her roommate.

After covering the girls in white foam, the athlete and his co-conspirator, also wearing a T-shirt turban, fled the scene.

Following the incident, the sorority chapter decided to handle the incident “civilly,” assuming the pranksters take responsibility for their actions. An initial estimate indicates the cost to clean the bedding, clothing, and computers could reach more than $1,000.

Don’t Spill the Beans

A UCSB student, 23, was still holding his half-eaten burrito when patrolling deputies spotted him passed out behind the wheel of his BMW parked near a favorite late-night burrito joint in Isla Vista.

Once awakened, the intoxicated subject could not tell authorities where, exactly, he lived.

“By the big dorms” was the only information he could provide before his arrest for public intoxication.

The whereabouts of the burrito is unknown.

No Big Surprise

A young man said he “did not know what to do” after a thief entered his unlocked apartment and left with a laptop. It was a friend, he said, who convinced him to contact the Sheriff’s Department the day following the burglary.

The victim, a Camino Pescadero resident, recalled hearing somebody open his bedroom door the night his laptop went missing.

“There is someone here,” he’d overheard the intruder whisper. However, not even the voice of a stranger stirred the victim from his bed.

It’s no surprise the burglars remain at large.

Carbing Up

Following the sound of clanking bottles and laughter, patrolling deputies contacted an inebriated man sitting on a bench after dark in Isla Vista’s Anisq’Oyo’ Park.

Eating bread and hovering over a collection of empty bottles, the wobbly young man had trouble recollecting the night’s events.

“Did I drink that?” he asked the deputies pointing at the empty bottles.

Adding, “I think I did, but I’m not sure. I guess I did.”

The report noted, the subject nearly fell off the bench during the interview.


Please note this login is to submit events or press releases. Use this page here to login for your Independent subscription

Not a member? Sign up here.